The Call to the SINGLE Life… A VOCATION not a STIGMA

“The unmarried man gives his mind to the Lord’s affairs and how he can please the Lord; but the man who is married gives his mind to the affairs of this world and to how he can please his wife, and he is divided in mind. So, too, the unmarried woman, and the virgin, gives her mind to the Lord’s affairs and to being holy in body and spirit; but the married woman gives her mind to the affairs of this world and to how she can please her husband.” 1 Corinthians 7: 32-34

Why is it in our modern society that when someone asks a person about their status in life the choices seem to be either…  




no gay marriage

Of course our Catholic Faith teaches that to practice that 3rd ‘choice’ is not a valid moral option and in fact Holy Scripture clearly condemns sodomy.  It is as much a mortal sin as promiscuous conjugal relations between an unmarried heterosexual couple.

Okay so what is a young Catholic man or woman to do if that perfect ‘soul-mate’ has not come along.  What if one is called to that UNMENTIONABLE vocation…


Yes folks, it’s perfectly okay to be single in our modern society and that doesn’t mean you are gay or that you are doing something wrong or that there is something WRONG with YOU because you are not married…

Sometimes God’s Holy Plan for a person’s life either within the Church or out in the world requires that a person remain – wellSPOUSE…less 🙂

vocation choices

Why is it that our society seems to judge and stigmatize those who are called to the VOCATION of being a Lay Christian Single Person?

And WHY is the first question/words out of most people’s mouths to that person…


I think the first thing we should do is to look back at the meaning and purpose of a Christian marriage.  Truly, the Christian purpose of any vocation in life, is to serve God Almighty and to be of service in our vocation to others and to our community at large.  This service is required of ALL FAITHFUL CHRISTIANS whether they are married or single or whether they are called to the ministry or a religious vocation.

The PURPOSE of our CHRISTIAN life’s vocation is NEVER personal gratification or sexual/sensual pleasure.  The purpose of any vocation is rightfully SERVICE to and SACRIFICE for OTHERS and for God Almighty.

That is where our modern society and culture are missing the mark and it is the reason why referendums on ‘GAY MARRIAGE’ are succeeding in Ireland and it is WHY there are so many divorces these days and so many children born out of wedlock and WHY there are so many ABORTIONS!  Our whole society is crumbling morally because we see the marital act as simply another BOTTLE OF BEER or a Psychedelic Drug which gives you a good feeling for a little while – and because we now have birth control available – so there are no ‘CONSEQUENCES’ !!!

all need is lovebc dancing

The marital act of love between a husband and wife is meant to be     LIFE-GIVING and OTHER-CENTERED and always focused ultimately on our mutual service to Almighty God in the procreation (and education) of our children.  It is NOT meant to be self-serving or used as a means to OBJECTIFY another person. While physical love can be a pleasurable experience – PLEASURE is NOT its SOLE PURPOSE!

But what about the man or woman who is NOT called to the vocation of marriage? There are many ways in which a single (non-married) lay person can be called to serve God.  Sometimes this service is manifested in the Sacrament of Holy Orders or as a missionary or other religious vocation.


I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own special gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.

To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is well for them to remain single as I do. (1 Cor 7:7-8)

– The Apostle Paul was NEVER MARRIED –



But there are MANY other options for the single lay Catholic man or woman.  There are many ways to live your vocation in the secular world while still pursuing the personal call to Holiness within your Catholic Faith.  Our Catholic Church provides many opportunities for a single person to serve God and others, from Lectors and Extraordinary Ministers of the Eucharist, to working at the local food bank or soup kitchen, or helping out as a volunteer at a Crisis Pregnancy Center.

It is not a sin nor should one feel stigmatized in any way because he/she is not called to a life of Sacramental Holy Matrimony and raising a family.    And that also does not (necessarily) indicate that God is calling you to become a priest or a nun.  All those vocations are good and Holy but they are not for everyone.  God doesn’t give us a cookie-cutter job to serve His Kingdom in this world, rather He gives us a place which he knew and ordained from the first moment of our conception.  We of course still have the gift of our free will, but as long as we choose a path which is in keeping with our Catholic/Christian Faith  and is in Obedience to Church authority and to all God’s Commandments, then God will keep us on a straight path toward Holiness and our Heavenly destination.

Some famous persons who were never married…

Florence Nightingale

Florence Nightingale






Susan B Anthony








Other notable SINGLES  U.S. Senator Lindsey Graham, Emily Dickinson, Sir Isaac Newton, and Thomas Jefferson who had been widowed for 19 years when he became our 3rd US President.

“The selfless, reciprocal, fruitful and indissoluble union between a man and a woman is part of God’s original plan and “the sacrament of marriage is a great act of faith and of love,” ~ Pope Francis



Posted on June 2, 2015, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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